The family and I went to the nearest "big" city over the weekend, and I didn't particularly enjoy myself. I know Stephen King thinks it's such a great place that he still lives there, but I really didn't see the appeal.

Maybe the city needs a image update, something to increase its draw to outsiders, something as quick and easy as changing the name by dropping off the last letter. Because I know I'd always look forward to a trip to "Bango."

Come to think of it, there are a lot of Maine towns that might sound better by dropping off the last letter:

Kennebun (don't they sell delicious pastries in shopping malls?)

Portlan (a new wireless networking configuration!)

August (it's summer every day!)

Yor (pirates!)

I think you'll understand why I left "Lisbon" and "Unity" off the list.